psalm 90:12

it's been a hard week. like a rollercoaster. up and down. joy, belonging, sadness, aloneness. actually, it's been more than a week, which maybe explains why i've not been in the blogging spirit.

the upshot of everything lately has brought me to pray this prayer daily, sometimes hourly:

teach me to live well. teach me to live wisely and well.

in saying that prayer, i am admitting that i have lived neither wisely nor well. i have spent many days, weeks, etc.... pursing things that are fleeting and eventually meaningless. recognizing your own shortcomings is always a growing process, especially when you're someone who prides herself on having it all together. so admitting brokenness is painful, but it paves the way for growing. and that is exciting. i struggle daily to be content and not complacent. fine line to walk. it is a process, my friends. exactly what i needed, and god is good

"this is good," she answered. "the broken places tell me i am alive, and now i feel. some growth has been pruned, but new growth is coming"